Chasing God, Chasing Our Sons

Today it's about my two boys. They are intertwined. They are connected. One slowly growing into his manhood. One still small enough to fit into my arms. I am in the middle. Both have my heart. The first is in the midst of his teen years. Tough years. The other, totally and completely dependent on me for his survival. No worry in the world! I look at one and see the other. God knows each of their individual needs. God has entrusted me to raise them both for His glory, not perfectly, but wholeheartedly doing my very best. I can't change the past but I can learn from it. I've made mistakes and I will continue to make mistakes, but each day I want to strive to do better. I wanted to share a little of my heart in how I am connecting the big boy with the little.

When we finally agreed to name our new baby boy Chase, I was excited about what his name meant to us! Our hearts desire and prayer for him to be a God Chaser, to "chase" after God's own heart every day of his life. I know he will be chasing a lot of other things, but this is above all else! For me personally, there was more though. I wanted to make sure I would be able to balance the teen years and infant years. One boy just as important as the other. Remembering a time in my life when I was a bit discouraged about my relationship with my son, I went to my husband with my concerns. This is the norm in our marriage. I take everything to heart and he balances my thoughts. He told me to "chase" my boy. During the times that I felt my son was being distant, I needed to put out that extra effort to pursue him. It wasn't a time for me to feel sorry for myself and withdraw from him. It was so much more. That piece of advice was HUGE to me!! It totally opened my eyes and turned the focus off of my feelings and onto what my boy needed. A great thing to remember I thought. So, naming Chase was also a way for me to constantly be reminded to "chase" my big boy! Not to let him live those teen years on his own and isolated, but to do the complete opposite! So, I'm chasing him.

I know everyone is different, but I thought I'd give some ideas of how we can chase our sons.

1. Praying for them. Where we can't reach them, God can. Never stop praying.
2. Meeting them at their level.  What do they value?  What is important to them?  Sometimes that can be uncomfortable for us, but it is worth it.
3. Chasing them can be silent sometimes. Just sitting with them. Being present and available. Listening with a whole heart and undivided attention. Really listen. You will be surprised at the subtle hints of their heart.
4. Giving them big bear hugs.
5. Taking them to their favorite restaurant. Knowing teen boys, it's more like fast food than anything! lol
6. Yogurt dates. Ice cream dates. Coffee dates. Even Target dates, those are my favorite.
7. Ask questions. Not nagging, be interested.
8. Ask them to help you fix something.
9. Praise them. Little accomplishments. Big accomplishments. Praise them.
10. Most importantly, love them with no strings attached. Unconditionally.

But if from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find him if you seek him with all your heart and with all your soul. (Deuteronomy 4:29 NIV)
Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it. (Proverbs 22:6 NIV)