Happy February! I missed new years, so considering this is my first blog of 2016, I felt like I had to celebrate! So, happy day! Happy thursday! We are already in the second month of this new year and I still have lots on my heart from the last few months. Time to just write it all down. The sun has been shining outside the last couple of days and I'd say it reflects whats going on inside of me also. God is great!
At the beginning of this year I felt God showing me that I was going to walk in strength this year. I was going to be strong. If there was a word for 2016, it was "STRENGTH" . There was a road ahead that required this of me. I needed to prepare and rise to the call. At first I raised my hand and said Yes!!! Then reality hit. At that time I was thinking, I am literally at one of the weakest times in my life. I am not strong at all. I am weak physically because of eating too much and not exercising. I am weak emotionally because I experienced different types of hurt, put calluses on my heart, and opened the door to discontentment and comparison. I am weak mentally because I started relying on myself and not God. Then comes my weakness spiritually because I felt like all I did was cry to God and I couldn't give any of His goodness to anyone. My well was dry. Totally not qualified to be a Woman of Strength!!!! This is the great part though. With God, we don't have to qualify to be worthy! We are! Right!!? God's grace, Jesus's blood makes us worthy and strong. So at that point I knew that if I had any strength in my being..... It Was and Is ALL God!
I started fighting back. I think my first step was acknowledging what was going on inside of my heart. I read a lot. Even in the midst of all this weakness, I still pressed on. I am still pressing on. One article I read was about allowing God to heal my heart rather than build calluses around it. That hit me right where it needed to. Being a mom, if your child gets hurt, you hurt a thousand times more. Most of the time I get over it, but this time I had hardened my heart. It wasn't good. I didn't "guard my heart," as the scriptures say to do. Then from there, I experienced some disappointments, received news about my health that I didn't want to hear, and went through some more growing pains of motherhood. My heart wasn't guarded. Looking at social media was the worst thing I could do for myself. But there I was, seeing all of the perfection blasted through the holidays and I fell into the lies of discontentment and comparison. I just wanted to be alone. I wanted to experience this pain alone. At that time I also condemned myself for wanting to go through it alone. Now looking back, I realize that some people like to go through their pain alone while others like people to ride along with them. Neither one is wrong. Condemnation is a heavy thing. Don't fall victim to it. God wants us to be free. Just another subject I can go on about.
Thank you Jesus, that all ended. I started praying and asking God to heal my heart. To soften it. To guard it. It is still tender, but the healing is very much at work. This is the absolute best part! I started looking up scriptures of strength. In the past I have always remembered scriptures of God telling us to Be Strong, but for some reason the scriptures that kept jumping out at me all had to do with God being my strength!!! I don't have to be because He IS!!! Best news ever to this weary momma! God is Great!
Before I wrap this up, I don't share all of this to have a pity party. Whenever I share my heart, it is always because I know if I am going through these things that I am not the only one. If I could somehow encourage one person by putting out my authentic heart for all the world to read about, then it is worth it. Pray for me, yes. Pray for all of your sisters in Christ who may be having tough seasons as well. We all need each other. Thank you for reading those of you in Russia, China, Germany and good ole' U.S.A. God is Great! To God Be The Glory!
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am STRONG. (2 Corinthians 12:9-10 NIV)
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the STRENGTH of my heart and my portion forever. (Psalm 73:26 NIV)
But I will sing of your STRENGTH in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble. (Psalm 59:16 NIV)
You are my STRENGTH I sing praise to you; you, God, are my fortress, my God on whom I can rely. (Psalm 59:17 NIV)
The LORD is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The LORD is the STRENGTH of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid? (Psalms 27:1 NKJV)
Finally, be STRONG in the Lord and in his mighty power. (Ephesians 6:10 NIV)
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives STRENGTH to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their STRENGTH. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:28-31 NIV)
“Be STRONG and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? Be STRONG and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:7-9 NIV)“
As for God, his way is perfect: The Lord’s word is flawless; he shields all who take refuge in him. For who is God besides the Lord? And who is the Rock except our God? It is God who arms me with STRENGTH and keeps my way secure. He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he causes me to stand on the heights. (2 Samuel 22:31-34 NIV)
