Step Back Momma Bear

In the last couple of weeks there have circumstances in my life when "momma bear" wanted to come out. In the past I have always justified the momma bear within. Anytime any of my kids were treated incorrectly, rejected, or wrong was done against them, I let that momma bear come out and most of the time my kids witnessed this. I'd tell myself, it's all out of love!! No one messes with my cubs!! Well, God showed me something different this time. 

As moms, we never want to see our babies hurt, rejected, or mistreated. We don't want them to go through difficult situations we may have faced growing up. We don't want them to experience pain or disappointment. They hurt. We hurt a hundred times worse. We carry the heaviness, the aching, like it's our own. I've talked about control before, but this is another example of what can cause us moms to be over controlling. If we keep them in our little controlled bubble of life, they won't experience any of these things. Or if they do, we are ready to attack those on the outside. The problem with this thinking is that when it all comes down to it, we cannot control everything that happens to our babies. 

As long as our kids are living and breathing there WILL be some kind of hurt in their lives. I know this is hard to hear, especially for those with little ones. It's very true though. The question I had to ask myself this time around is what am I teaching my kids by roaring like a bear, ready to give the accused a piece of my mind.  Or even better, wanting to take my child out of the environment that is causing their pain. What is this teaching them? Could my attitude reflect the ongoing problem of entitlement in our kids today? How can our kids develop character, integrity, humility, perseverance, courage, and learn to trust God in their own lives and the lives of others when they see momma bear roaring with anger, being quick to rescue them every time? Does it make sense to teach them to be strong and courageous, then take them out of the very situation that builds this type of character within them? How can I teach them to rejoice in trials when I try to be the savior instead of letting God be their savior? How can I teach them to trust that God will uphold them when I try to fix everything? Yes, we all want our kids to get that part in the play, or earn that position on the team, be liked by their teachers, coaches and those in authority. So when they don't get that part, or they are sitting on the sideline, or they aren't the apple of their teacher's eye. How can we better respond to these situations? How can we respond like Christ?

I'm learning it all comes down to having faith in God's sovereignty in their lives. Yes, if wrong was done we can point it out, but instead of teaching anger and bitterness, we can teach grace and forgiveness. Even compassion. Jesus is the ultimate example. He endured it all and still responded with the biggest act of love ever known to man. Now most everything I am referring to is in response to my older kids. I know with littler ones it is different. I'm in a stage of my life though where my 2 older kids will be grown adults in this world before I know it and I want to do my best to raise them to reflect Christ in all they do.  I want them to stand strong.  They need to know how to handle the difficult situations.  They need to be able to grow from them.  I want Christ to be able to work in their lives. In their hearts.  

Thank you Jesus for this huge lesson in my life. I pray that I will remember this in days to come. So, I'm telling myself. Take a step back momma bear. Be still. Pray like crazy. Seek God for wisdom in the situation and trust in his faithfulness. Yes, there will be times we will need to speak on their behalf and be their advocate, but how much better it will be if we gain the Father's wisdom and go together in prayer about it first. To God Be the Glory!

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. (James 1:2-5 NIV)